Sunday, August 5, 2007

The notebooks of Clive James...

But Stalin's speeches were the merest rehearsal for the tedium of his writings. It was particularly brutal of him to call his personally penned missal on the theory and practice of communism The Short Course. There was nothing short about it except its length. - Clive James, Cultural Amnesia


Stalin was a really crap writer.

Oh, awful, Clive, what are you saying?
Stalin wrote very long, very bad books.

Terrible
The only thing short in Stalin's books was their quality.

Ewch! Hideous!
The only thing in short stature in short supply (better) in Stalin's books (too much detail) them was their quality.

No, no, no, no, no!
The only short thing in them was literature.

Oh, too, too pretentious by half, darling.
Stalin was really quite a bad writer.

NON! (To quote Mel Brooks)
Stalin was awful.

Obvious, in more ways than one. Plus, I think J might get offended. She's a commie.
Stalin's books were really fucked up.

Much too honest, the publisher would never let that through. Also, J.
The only thing short about them was nothing.

Banal.
The only nothing short about them was

Oh GOD, Clive, can you get any worse?
The thing

FUCK!
The only thing short about them was their length.Hmmm, I'll stick with this one for the moment. God, this writing is hard work. I really need a coffee. And where did I leave my pills? Aaaaaaack! J! J! HELP ME!

3 comments:

nick cetacean said...

you construct html tables like a god! Like the god of html tables in Greek mythology

Tim said...

Nice one, TT.

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